No Superwoman here….

So. It’s time. 

It’s time to admit that I am no superwoman. That life has gotten in the way and well, admit defeat. In a month I hoped to release my book, “Be Still and Listen”. I have set up social media for it, I have worked countless hours on it and still… I am not ready. 

It might be my fear of imperfection. It might be the rude and terrorizing inner editor, it might be…. goodness so many reasons! But the bottom line is still that I know it’s not right to push out a piece of work that is not where I want it to be. 

WELL! Doesn’t that just put me in a pickle! This feels like a failure to me. This feels like I have not kept my word. This feels sad. But like a pickle, sometimes they taste better if they have been in the brine for a bit, maybe my book needs a bit more stewing as well. 

There was a group at my studio a week or two ago. I shared with them my concerns about the book release. The calendar was ticking away the days and while I think the book is SO DARN CLOSE, it is not where I really want it to be. They were very supportive and suggested that the craziness in my personal life was a perfect excuse to not release the book as yet. While I appreciate their support, I believe the real reason is that it just not ready.

So, here is the irony- I FEEL so much urgency about this. But you know.. it’s not yet done pickling I suppose. I have issues with the fact that this book has been in the works for far too long. However, if I am following what I suggest YOU do in my book- the whole premise of the book is to, “be still and listen”.

So, dear patient and wonderful friends, that is what I am going to do. I suppose things will blossom on their own time, not when we wish to force it to. I am frustrated with this decision (again, that whole failure thing) but I do have peace with the fact that this is the correct decision. That said I shall end this missive now, as I have an anniversary exhibit to plan! Stay tuned, this book WILL be out soon. 

Thanks for your love, and your patience. 

My love and gratitude to you!

Susan

 

 

the art of… welcoming a new year.

First, may I wish you a most wonder filled new year. Like most years, 2012 was filled incredible blessings and deepest sorrows. I pray that you find healing from all that has hurt you and inspiration from each of your blessings. I pray that whatever your hopes are for the near year you are able to not only attain them, but conquer each and every one!

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While we are here, I’d like to share my thoughts on new year’s resolutions. As a youth I saw the new year as a fresh slate, an opportunity to change for good. It was an exciting time! I had a fresh calendar to fill out, new opportunities, and the ability to right the wrongs of the past year. It was a feeling of near euphoria at the freshness of the year. I was optimistic and determined.

The issue with this is that I never really allowed for my own humanity. I would start out like gangbusters, full of ambition. I would work hard at being faithful to my goals- certain that this year would be different. Then I’d find myself faltering. A stumble becomes a fall, a fall becomes a broken resolution. Once I broke my new year’s resolution, whatever that might be, I felt my opportunity had been crushed and there was no chance of attaining my goals. To me, the opportunity was lost.

How silly am I?

It is a darn good thing that God does’t work that way! In my mind -one strike and you are out. Heck, baseball doesn’t even work that way!

I have been thinking a great deal these days about opportunity and personal growth. I fully dedicate that this year to growth and goals, hopes and making dreams bloom. However, it’s also about personal forgiveness.

So- I am not perfect. That’s okay, I don’t HAVE to be.

I do however, have to be determined and bigger than my weakness. I do have to pick myself up after I understand yet again, that I am not perfect.

It is clear to me that you need not be perfect to succeed, (maybe just a little spunky). Even Lincoln lost a total of eight elections before winning the presidency. Clearly he made his mark on the world and is considered today to be one of the greatest humans who have graced the earth. By all standards before he won the presidency, he was a failure.

The lesson here seems to be that we keep going. Don’t let your stumbles defeat you, learn from them, be more determined than your failures. Don’t allow one bad day take the wind from your sails. Forgive your own imperfections.

Remember- today is chapter 2013- page 1 of 365. Now go catch those dreams. Write your own chapter, breathe your own success. It IS within you. If today you don’t reach the goals you thought you should, tomorrow is another day.

Thanks for listening.

In peace-
Susan