It’s interesting. For most of my life, I have wanted nothing more than to make art. It’s what I want to do with most of my days, what I fill countless journals with my ideas about, and what gives peace to my soul. The only other thing I think about or dabble in seems to be writing or teaching. Both have their graces for me. Both can be a joy.
However
It occurs to me that there might just be something else I would like to do at times. I KNOW- you are shocked, so am I. It inspires me to think that there is more. I am not pigeon holed in one secure idea of making art. It’s exciting to me that I might actually think outside my own paintbox to something else.
The message was clear just a week or so ago when my lovely daughter gifted me with a ticket to see Phantom of the Opera. It was a wonderful play, I was acquainted with the story line, loved the music and enjoyed the gifts of the performers as they worked their heart out for me.
BUT
What I kept getting lost in, was the set and stage design. How they manipulated things as they were performing flawlessly. There were no obvious transitions unless you were paying VERY close attention. Well, I was.
It was magical.
It was incredible.
I wanted to be in charge of it!
I was sitting there actually trying to focus on the story line, the music, the actors.
I had a very difficult time trying to do so.
Then. a light bulb went off
(that was clever, right?)
I sat there fighting with myself over my ability whether intellectually or creatively to attain such excellence. I found myself saying, “I could NEVER do that.”
Fortunately, the voice of confidence peaked through to counteract that negativity and I began planning how I would plan the transitions. It was interesting and fun. I continued to fight with myself to pay attention to the play and NOT the transitions and set design.
It was a delightful performance.
I was completely enchanted with the design.
this was NOT the first time this has happened to me.
I will be honest to say, I have actually uttered the words, “I am too old to change gears now.”
That feels like a defeated acceptance to me.
As I sat in the theatre that lovely afternoon, I found myself asking, “why?”
Why until I draw my last breath should my choices be over?
Why indeed.
That moment was empowering to me. While I am not certain that I will be designing any sets any time soon, I find that I feel more empowered to do what I want to. Whatever that might be. My choices don’t have to be limited. Nor do yours.
I encourage you to NOT accept your OWN limitations- push past them.
Do what YOU want. Don’t allow anyone to tell you differently.
(and just a hint when that ominous music plays…. LOOK OUT!)
I wish you peace and freedom to be whatever you wish to be.
Susan